Marriage: Wondering Over Women Insincerity

By Anonymous Woman

My Elder brother, I mean our dads first born wife’s Salary Was a Mystery Until he discovered How Much She’s Truly Worth

In 2016 she told my brother her salary was 120k. And then two years later, when she got promoted, he asked about her salary and she said, “Oh these people, don’t mind them. They added only 30k to my old salary. Because of her meager salary, my uncle have taken up so many responsibilities in the house without complaint. He pays for utilities and pay for food. He pays the fees of their two kids, clothe them, and take care of their medical bills.

When his wife sends him a grocery list, she will adds sanitary pads. She buys dresses and clothes, comes to show them to him, and asks him to pay for them. She started talking about a car when their second child came in. Things weren’t good on my brothers side he asked her to give him some time. She said, “I’ve saved something. I can add it to what you have so you pay me when your money comes.”

My brother agreed and took that money from her, topped it up to get her a car. For three months my brother ears never rest. She would wake up at dawn and ask him to pay what he owed her. He got tired and took a loan paid the money when he didn’t have much in his account.

One evening, I went to visit my brother, I took my laptop with me, was working on my first degree project then and it was weekend, I slept over in their place, my brothers wife borrowed my laptop too to check her mails even without my consent.
Un-passworded though.

Following day I turned my laptop on and saw a lot of emails. I checked and it was my brothers wife’s email that had been opened. I asked her, “Did you use my laptop?” She answered, “Yeah I was checking something.” I told her, “Then you didn’t log out.” She answered, “I forgot. Please log out for me.” I was about to log out when something caught my attention. I saw a mail with the subject, “January Payslip.” already opened and viewed.
I over looked it and began to do something else until my brother ask me to bring my laptop, I was curious so I stood by him to see what he wants to use my laptop for ,he said hope you haven’t logged out my wife’s email bring it I want to check something and started going through. When he saw her gross salary, he was shocked. 4.1 million yearly? And this girl has been crying poverty?

He began to dig, he went through the details. That night he couldn’t sleep. He was angry. They have been married for six good years and his wife earned that much without his husband knowledge? How much she earned didn’t bother my brother a lot than what she was using that money for. He decided not to talk immediately but rather do a little bit of investigation.

He took her phone in the mid night and started with her best friend. Nothing much was found. Her family had a Whatsapp group. He read the messages there. He got few hints. He went through the chat with her father and that was when he realized his wife had bought a piece of land and had started building. Her father was in charge of the project. He had sent photos of the various stages of the building. At some point, her father said, “Thank you for helping out your brother. He would have been home had it not been you.”

She has only one brother—her senior brother. And my brother went to look for the chat between them. Her senior brother lost his job and was home doing nothing so my wife bought her Hyundai i10 to use for Uber. Every week, her brother rendered an account and they split the money. From all indications, my brothers wife was doing well for herself while she plays poor so she could rely on my brothers salary. Why would she do that? My brother thought he was being a supportive husband so his wife could be proud of the man she married. When he bought land, it was her name and my brothers name that appeared on the land title. That car he bought for her with a loan from her bears her name. He didn’t mind. He believed what’s hers was also mine.

The next morning she realized he wasn’t looking well. He was boiling on the inside but looking for a good opportunity to start the conversation. When he calmed down a little, he asked her, “So why would you do that to me?” She asked, “What have I done?” my brother answered, “You bought land, you never told me. You started building on it, you never told me. When are you going to tell me?” She was shocked. She asked, “Who told you all that?” he said, “Your father did.” She stood quiet for a while. She asked, “Why would my father tell you all that? What were you people talking about” he said, “I don’t know. You can ask him.”

They bothleft it there. Some minutes later she came to my brother with her phone: “My father wants to talk to you.” The phone was already on a loudspeaker. His father was clearly angry. He asked, almost shouting, “You said I told you my daughter has a building? Where did I say that and when?” my brother asked, “Is it not true that my wife has a building project going on that you’re supervising?” He asked me, “I told you that?” my brother asked, “Is it true or not?” After the back and forth he told them, “I read your messages last night. I saw the pictures. I read the various budget you had sent to my wife. I read the confirmation of the money receipts that you sent her. You’re a man. Would you be happy if your wife does this to you?” He started fumbling. He started apologizing saying he thought he was aware.”

My brothers wife stood there motionless, didn’t know what to say. When her father hung up, my brother told her everything he knew, from her salary to the car she bought for her brother. He said, “Yet, even your sanitary pad, he buy them. You think I’m a fool? You’ll use your money to acquire your own properties and live on mine because you’re my wife? I hear. We’ll see.”

Trust was lost. Love was broken. They had to find a new way of living their lives going forward. Her father called my brother every morning and evening apologizing for everything and sometimes taking up the blame so my brother didn’t have to blame his daughter. My brother told him, “The emotional state he is in right now, it would be hard to think straight or think forgiveness. Just give me space.” Three days later, they were in my brothers house. The father, the mother, and the senior brother. They came to apologize. “Don’t let this break up the beautiful marriage you both have. If nothing at all, consider the kids and be lenient in your judgment.”

My brother and I listened to them. And his position was still the same. “I need time to clear my mind. Just leave me alone to think.” he said

some weeks ago. She agreed she’ll pay for the car. I’ve given her two months to pay up or I sell it and take my money. She’s getting the message and I’m glad. Each one for himself, God for us all. She keeps asking if I’m going to leave her. I keep telling her I won’t but if she wants a divorce, I will gladly give her. I’m not going to leave the marriage. I would give us some time to heal and see what may happen but when it comes to money, I’ve taken the lesson she taught me through her actions.

As a lady I am still surprised till date though.